This is the story of my goddamn motherfucking stupid life: The worst bad beat I have ever taken

This is the closest I have ever come to throwing my laptop out the window.
This is the closest I have ever come to punching a hole in the wall.
This is the closest I have ever come to taking a baseball bat to my TV.
This is most I have ever wanted to kill someone or something.

This is story of my stupid fucking life playing poker. This is why I have never done well in a big tournament. This is precisely the reason why I will never do well in a big tournament. I swear to god, I want to quit this stupid fucking game forever right now. This game is total bullshit and what I am about to tell you can only happen to me not once, not twice, but fucking three times. And of course it had to happen in one of the most important situations in my poker life.

Remember this post: I am going to direct everyone back to this when I play in my first WSOP or big live event and I get jewed really hard.

I am already running bad to begin with as I have cashed in 1 tournament over the last 3 days. I really could care less though because this was going to more then make up for it.

Here's the setting:

Satellite for the Cake 100K guaranteed tournament for 100 players. First place in that tournament is 25K and everyone gets paid.

The entry in this tournament is the Queen of Spades gold card which is the 9th rarest card in the gold card promotion. I have only two pictures cards out of 16 and I just happen to have this one. I already know coming in that this is going to be by far my best opportunity to get in this tournament as the number of entrants is going to be very limited.

Sure enough only 41 enter and top 4 are going to get in the big dance.

I ran hot early and put together a stack. Surprisingly the tournament was full of bad players which really surprised me because only the high limit players have the highest gold cards.

We get down to the final table and we are 9 handed. I have 11K in chips and I am in 6th place. We are all pretty bunched up at the top so I am not too worried. I have been folding more hands then I would like but I finally get what I have been looking for.

I pick up A A. And of course over the last few days I am like 2 for my last 12 with pocket aces all in pre flop. And I am literally 0 for my last 80 against Aces in the same situation. I haven't cracked aces all in pre flop in over a month. And as usual I take way more then my share of bad beats. Thats why I call myself DrBadBeat. It's because I know so much about them that I could have PhD in the science.

UTG is a shortstack and shoves all-in for 5K.

I obviously throw it all in myself and everyone else folds.

Hero A A
Villain A Q

Now remember I have been in this situation probably several hundred times in the last few months and never once have I won when I have had Ax. I have lost thousands of dollars because of this cooler. Of course I have only had A A in this spot only a few times and I have already lost several times over the last few days.

The way this hand went down was the exact same way it happened in the Sunday tournament and the exact same way it went down last night. Can I actually win one of these for a change? Please?

No I can't.

Only I can lose after this flop.

A x x two hearts and villain has the queen of hearts.

I don't need to tell you what the turn and river were because I knew what it was going to be before it was even dealt.

This is what I will say.

I am a 96.6% favorite on the flop.

3 times since Sunday I have seen this exact flop. 3 times I have lost.

I have finally figured this game out.

You have to be one of the chosen few who actually win.

The rest are all losers.

I am not one of the chosen ones.

I am up over 45K in the last 2.5 years playing this game but I have been playing for 7 years. There are kids who have only been playing a couple years who are betting 45K on every hand. They are the chosen ones. I am not.

Never will I hit 30K in one tournament or 100K or whatever else.

I will keep getting my little 1.2K scores which are nice but I am fucking greedy. I am really fucking greedy.

I don't want to spend the rest of my life working for the man waking up ass early every day.

I want to own houses and travel the world. I will never get to do those things if I don't play poker as a result of my background. That is why I will keep playing this stupid fucking game that I hate until I am no longer allowed to play.

That is all.

I have had enough and I am sure you have too.

Quit this game now before you become me. Way past the point of no return. I can't give up for the sole reason that I have dedicated too much time and resources and quitting now would only be a waste.